January 11, 2011

Stupid Cupid

I ran across this today: What your dating profile says about you.

This article was hilarious. I mean, I thought it would be helpful my selfish self. But it wasn't. There were a lot of theoretical math equations about the looks in relation to messages received on a dating website.

I hate math.

I hate math in relationships. Relationships are not an "x+y=z". NOT AT ALL. I assume others will wholeheartedly disagree with me.

But what struck me as strange was when a group of me have polarizing views of a woman, somehow she becomes more attractive.
The article poses this with the following example:

"Suppose you're a man who's really into someone. If you suspect other men are uninterested, it means less competition. You therefore have an added incentive to send a message. You might start thinking: maybe she's lonely. . . maybe she's just waiting to find a guy who appreciates her. . . at least I won't get lost in the crowd. . . maybe these small thoughts, plus the fact that you really think she's hot, prod you to action. You send her the perfectly crafted opening message."

To me this means it is better to be ugly, than cute, but not as good as being hot. Which, to me, seems a little, shall we say, fucked up.
And the fact that this site (one that I love) is really playing up the look card on this, rather than the content card. I mean even some guys don't want anything beyond a one night-er with a girl who is as dumb as a box of rocks.

But so runs the way of the world.

This is the best comment ever:

In order to verify how much credence women will give this information, OK Cupid needs to apply a formula in which the value of increased dudely attention (d) from men worth ogling (o) is decreased in value by the increased incidence of unwanted advice from dudes (u), cockshots (c), hellishly long cries for attention (h), or from those you consider to be too elderly to date (e).

That formula would be:

d = o - (uche)

This formula is surprisingly fast and easy to use! You see the e-mail, think to yourself, "This is a douche!"

October 28, 2010

No... Really, relationships are complicated

After watching all the TV I can stand... I decided, relationships are NOT for TV.
I mean seriously, the Jersey Shore people swapping sloppy seconds... the Sister Wives trying to make their lives normal... Seriously.

REAL relationships are not meant to be on TV.
The silver screen sure... who doesn't love a good Rom-Com. or a good One-that-got-away.
I digress.

What I am trying to say, is that I feel the real intimacies of REAL relationships need not be broadcast-ed for all to see. I mean, really... Rachel Zoe's fear of getting fat from getting pregnant and seeing he husband pretty much BEG for a baby? Did we need to see those character flaws. I prefer to remember my RZ as the Starbux toting bug eye wearing waif that she was. And her husband, as well... her husband, not a baby crazed man.

No one wants to see the fights esp. the stupid ones over what to have for dinner or who left their contacts in the sink instead of rinsing them down the drain.

Admittedly, I briefly blogged about MY relationship. I realize now... That could have been done better, or not at all.

So, in my search for info on this... I found charts... WAY better than information.




Charts taken from here

October 12, 2010

Finally, I'm back... with a "bang"

I know I haven't been writing. I think I really was just waiting for the right piece of info to fall into my lap, and start a little blog-fire at my desk.

Ladies and gents, I give you: "THE "F*uck List"

NOW... this has been on the news (ok, the Today Show)

And this has some people in an uproar. I think this is completely misguided. This document was intended as a field guide for a small group of people whom the author knew (so the author says) and one of those people made the document public (the groupie owned up to this too). I think many of us have created documents meant to be seen by one or a few sets of eyes only, like a blog, diary, or just a friendly note passed from one to another... and at times, these documents get viewed by the wrong people or land in the wrong hands.

Personally I think emailing this power-point document (42 or so slides) was the authors downfall. I mean, honestly, I would really want a hard copy... not like a covered, nicely bound copy, but a generic copy paper style. Nothing says "I think you should have all this knowledge I have acquired" like a super thick (hah) document in my hands from a close personal friend (this is almost a 'that's what she said').

But let's be honest, let's brass tacks this...
1. This is what we women do with our friends (hellllo, Sex in the City, anyone?). WE compile our data over time (one night, one week, one year, whatever) and we will update our female cohorts and send out our queries to our close personal friends. We will ask, "Is the normal?", "Does this happen to you?", "What do I do?" etc. We will ask eachother these questions and listen and LEARN from one another experiences.

2. I actually commend this woman for compiling all this research and putting it in a easy to view format and GIVING it to her friends. I applaud the time, effort and money (alcohol costs money-- well, apparently until the new test subject starts buying the shots) into this labor of lust. OH and it has easy to read charts.

3. Critics are calling her a female Tucker Max. That is... horrible. Tucker Max is a self proclaimed asshole, narcissist, womanizer... This female author is claiming none of this. Honestly, I think she is a brainier Carrie Bradshaw with more details, pictures and sexts but possibly without the syndicated column and the closet.
She isn't selling this to make money (yet) as TM did (he wrote the book I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell, which was also made into a crap movie that I am sorry was ever in my Netflix queue). She did this for amusement (which we've ALL done) and entertainment (we've done this too). Someone she knew went a step to far by posting it for all to see.

But this, to me is the unmentioned kicker... How hard is it for some of those Duke boys to get a hookup now (esp after that lacrosse team incident a few years ago). I mean, now a portion (or all) of Duke women KNOW their size, their skill level... I mean, before these boys could use a certain amount of prowess or finesse with words to con a Duke woman into their unskilled, unsatisfying clutches (granted, based on the chart not all of them are unskilled and/or unsatisfying). And I imagine the ones ranking at the top are still filling their wants/beds/needs/etc. with little or no problem; they probably owe this woman a thank you letter.

September 20, 2010

OK... try again

I know I need to update more.

I know I have been saying that.

I know I need to follow through with it.

July 30, 2010

information junkie

I am an information junkie.
I have the constant yearning desire to always know more.

When a problem arises in my life, I Nancy Drew it for solutions. I consult, I research, I read, etc. I do whatever I can to find out more about the problem to generate better solutions.

My most recent problem has sent me to a myriad of sources... movies, classic novels, cosmo, web md, and lastly (and most recently i.e. today) the self-help section of the library. And after A LOT of reading... I am still at a loss. I didn't find solace in the information at my magazine inked fingertips.

Instead, I felt only more... lost. Like somehow the answer is SO simple, and I am too stupid to see it right in front of me. Like, somewhere along the way I learned this lesson... and now, it's like a pop quiz to see if I learned anything...
only, this isn't the right class, the test is in the wrong language and I lack the proper writing utensil.

June 10, 2010

Here and There

It has been MONTHS since I blogged.

A lot has gone down. A lot has gone up.
And currently... It seems... messy.

Days no longer matter, I no longer care what day of the week it actually is, I mean what does it matter if it Tuesday or Monday? It boils down to do I work or am I off work. That is how I judge My Time.
My Time is measured in 4 hour chunks... before work, work before break, break, work after break, after work, sleep.
It is just a swirl of repetition only distinguishable by the growing molehill of laundry.

I should put in the effort to put in time here...

February 3, 2010

heart stop loss

delicate, i laid you out...
gingerly placed you upon the bamboo cutting board.

sharpened knives
neatly in their holders
standing guard, up-right

the slow, room temperature thaw
loosening tendons
collapsing ventricals

what, was once an organic
beating life
takes on the mechanical tick of the timer.

burners warm
pots and pans gather round for the spectacle.

the sharp deft movement
of the blade
splicing the heart
neatly
into two.